1. Whatever form of transportation you you are using, you have the right of way.

Explanation If you are crossing an 8 lane intersection diagonally, you have the right of way.

2. The best car to take camping is someone elses.

Explanation If you own a Humvee and your friend owns a Ferrari with no trunk or brakes, your friend's car is the best car to take camping.

3. The shortest path between two points A and B travels through every pub in an area (A-B)² that contains those two points.

Explanation Your walk home is shortened by a factor of 1/(1+n) where n is the number of pubs you stop in on the way. Multiply the denominator by the wetness factor K if it's raining.